Dear The Me I Used to BE...
Today was weird for/to me. To say I am faced forward and looking for something NEW in every area of my life is not just a resolution for me, people make resolutions and then hardly follow through; however I am actually looking to create a new life. I have endured so much negativity in my life; that this year for me is about making my life look totally different by the time I turn 45 in October. There are so many things I desire to see differently and experience for the first time ever.
Day 3: So, today was weird in that it felt much like last year and exactly what I am trying to avoid at all cost. Isn't it funny when you make up your mind for change, you almost live in the new place more than you do the transitional space and because of that, today was not my best. The great part about it is that I clung to the vision of the new so much that I accidentally ran into an old friend who was speaking to me about her tangible change and when she asked about me, I began to go into the most vividly detailed parts of where I wish to see change. I explained it so thoroughly that she SAW it with me, for me. She was super excited about what I am doing (not attempting to do). That at least made the fact that I came home exhausted and took a nap like I used to do in 2017 and the very thing I am leaving behind, different. I did the opposite of what I wanted; it's okay though because I see it as it is... a day in a life. We have 362 more to go and they will not resemble this one at all, I guarantee.
I also called a family member (ex-sis in love)and reiterated what I am accomplishing this year. I explained to both, the friend and sister, that I am even thinking about a geographical change, career change, status change (single, ready for marriage), physical change, spiritual depth and I am actually looking to be more social (more outgoing). I know EXACTLY what I desire in a mate, I am working on building a future career, while enjoying and giving my all where I currently am. I know who I am supposed to be, I know what I am supposed to look like, I know what I aspired to feel like, I am excited about cultivating new friendships, I am ready to emerge from the inside out... there is a wonderful woman within me and she is screaming to make her entrance not only this year; but NOW. She is dying to live... which means death to the old me and living my prophecy (life) to the fullest.
Today resembled yesteryear in that I was extremely exhausted and needed to rest; but with each passing day, my mentality has catapulted me to a new dimension spiritually. I always have said that whatever you SEE in the natural has gotten its start in the spiritual realm. You must be able to see it spiritually before you can SEE it manifest naturally. I have already seen the manifestation of my future self/life and I am not stopping until I SEE it and live it daily for the rest of my life. The fact that I made it HERE, to this blog, today shows me that the resemblance of this day to last year, is still different. It is the choices we make daily that changes our lives and my dedication to this blog that came to me on New Year's Eve is indeed a change toward the better. This day was weird; but, it was not truly like last year. I refuse to revisit that place in totality ever again. Here's to small differences in what seems to be the mundane, for it is indeed those differences that makes the difference.
Love You DEARLY LADY,
THE ME I AM GOING TO BE
No comments:
Post a Comment